Sunday, November 29, 2009

A Combination of Things

Apprentice, kindness, personality, humor, intelligence. These are the things (in the order) that the guys around me rate as the necessities to a girl they like. In that order.
First of all I am quietly swearing under my breath, because I am pretty sure I have been accentuating these qualities in the opposite order. Secondly, I ask- who are they to judge. I do not see the most attractive, kind, amazingly funny or smart guys before me.
All I see is disappointment. But no longer is it the girls I am looking at but myself. Why have I been defining myself with the likes of men. No longer will I give pieces of my heart away to guys who seem to be okay. I will instead begin to ward off anything that comes my way. I know I have been there only for the chase. I will no longer do that. I will live for freedom again. Because guys at this point, to me, are not worth the struggle.

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